Open Letter to CDA Chairman

Protesting against the blockade of Water supply.

 

We are humans, not animals, we have needs just like any other creature, we also stink when we dont bath for long, we have desires to be clean. I am sure you won’t like it when you are stinky just because your home is out of water. You won’t either like to smell as skunk. We the residers of Islamabad who are not ministers, who are not secretaries in a government office. we the people who are as common as a goat which doesn’t have a market before Bakra Eid. We are in dire need of water to keep ourself clean and perform other neccessary human traits.

You know the absense of water is turning us into a wild animal who can dung anywhere, who can pee anywhere, which also doesnt care about his apperance. But since we are still humans, we care about it. We are still shy to dung in the middle of a highway, we are still shy to pee at a place where there’s a line “Yahan per Pishaap karna Mana hai”, and above all it feels strangest to take bath in the washroom of office.

Perhaps, the lust of authority has exempted you to think about the general public who is suffering everyday on your hand. Trust me, you are not earning any virtues, I curse and woe you everyday. I don’t want to curse anyone but at times the things go beyond the limits of human tolerance and then unthinkingly I curse you. You know how hard is it to complain for a water tanker? Its three times that we have to get into a line to get a water tanker for which we pay. At first, you have to get in line to write down your name and then before 2 am, you have to be there to assure that you need a tanker and then again at 5 am, you have to be at complaint center in person to re-assure that you need a water tanker for your home. And then again I curse you.

One last thing I want to remind you, the CDA is doing everything to prove it wrong that “Cleaniness is half of Imaan”, please dont be a fresh god of era as all the gods in past had a moralful ending. Please respect us and our pleed. Thank you.

Pakistan in the Wake of Nightmare

As I started walking towards my house, it was nearing dawn. The stars were busy in their usual dance and not a cloud wavered in the skies, but in the sudden of few minutes the breath-taking scene turned into the worst nightmare. The crackling of thunder sent a numbing sensation through my body. The lightning, blinding my eyes tilted all perceptions into an odd axis. An instinct of urgency spurred me to walk faster. In a space of a few minutes, the drizzle turned into a storm. Every drop felt like a tsunami in form and feel.

 I had never seen such a horrible storm in my whole life. A golden dawn was covered by black clouds showering rain worse than acid. After a struggle ensued in the ruthless storm I caught a glimpse of my home.  As I got closer, I realized the storm was only around my home. By the time I stood at the entrance, the storm had reached an incomparable ferocity.

As I entered home, I couldn’t believe it was my abode. There were a lot of people in there, millions of them, different in color, different in races, different in languages. Before I could recover this shock, a beast jumped in. It was enormous, a beast probably bigger than empire state building. I witnessed a sea of faces going pale in a matter of seconds. Fear was in the air and everyone was breathing it. Adding to that the howl of beast played the whistle of death for everyone.

People started to die, one after another; I could see the bodies falling. House that was not home anymore, bodies that were not alive anymore, hell must be a better place than this, a sudden thought that hit my mind. I was witnessing something worse than hell. Before the beast started to make the bodies his food, I saw my home collapsing, walls going down one by one, I ran towards the exit gate. Before the last wall of my home fell down, I realized it’s not my home, it is Pakistan.

As I woke up, a transition from darkness to brightness started, splashes of white light ascended on the dark curtain. A cool breeze welcomed me into a different world. The sweat dripping down my brow felt as if it had just rained. It was another storm but this time it was in my head, the storm of thoughts that was hitting my already occupied mind.

Soon the blurred dream cleared, the questions answered themselves. I realized, the beast lives somewhere in our twisty heads. It is feeble and small, but it grows when we silence our voices against the corruption. It develops when we close our eyes to injustice. It laughs when we support nepotism, it dances when tyranny prevails. We ignore it everyday every-time and this ignorance is making it stronger.

Let us face the stark truth, the truth that is unpleasant and bitter. We are hoping that such nightmares would not come true but in some far off corner in our mind, we know that it eventually would if we keep ignoring the wrong. We are developing the beast into a barbarian monster. If we keep ignoring it like this, I am afraid; someday the beast might become real and destroy us. Jump of a Desi grey cat from the ledge brought a stop to ocean of thoughts in my head, I look out it’s a bright sunny day.

I am a Pakistani just like you.

Sometimes I consider myself a superman, sometimes batman and most of the time a very idle man.

These days my household expenses are covered by the awe-inspiring beats of my drum in the streets of Islamabad at Seher Time.

I am so fond of giving interviews but being a common man, no one is interested in interviewing me, so i will ask myself questions.

**Why do you think you are superman?**

Well there are lot of reasons for being a superman. First I have this t-shirt with Superman printed on it. Other reason is that living without Electricity and Natural Gas actually makes me believe that I am a superman. In the mean of sometime I am sure you’d also think this about yourself.

**Do you believe in Revolution?**

No I rather believe in devolution. We are going through devolution for many years now. There’s something called a bad state, but above it there’s something called the worst state. We are even below that state. So if you again ask me if I believe in revolution, I’d rather steal your trousers out of a swimming pool.

**What do you think about Pakistan?**

Aah Pakistan? Pakistan is a nice country, it has four provinces. Oh Wait! It has five provinces. Oh No! It has some 6 provinces and other 10 or 20 are in compile time. The people are Pakistan are very nice to everyone. They are so good at mystical knowledge, you’d never know about your ‘Chappal’ once its gone from a local Mosque in jummah Prayer. They are so kind as well. The state of Karachi is the best example for it. Beside they really care for their country. However they are bit lazy to get out of their bed on a election morning to cast their vote.

**Who is Quaid e Azam?**

I think I have read about him somewhere. Oh I remember when I was kid, I asked my uncle about the old man on 1 rupee note. He happened to be Quaid e Azam. Well I think he was founder of Pakistan. Luckily he didn’t survive for long after the creation of Pakistan, else he would have died by seeing it.

**Are you happy with the current Government of Pakistan?**

Yes I am very happy about the Government of Pakistan. The government is doing good work but I am very unhappy about the people who brought it. The people of Pakistan should eat almonds on the note of daily basis. I hear it improves memory.

**If you were president of Pakistan, what changes you would to bring?**

Well don’t expect much from him, after all I am a Pakistani as well. At first place I would give away Rolls Royce Phantoms to each member of my family. Then I would buy myself a Ferarri 595 and would go on a ride with my girl friend. I think these banks are very unsafe place for the peoples money, So Its better to place the peoples money in President House Safe. I would amend the constitution in every possible way to prolong my reign.

**Who is your inspiration?**

The great ‘Double Shah’ is my inspiration. I am sure nobody on earth can be this evil in fooling people with the exception of Zardari Sahib.

I am no different from anyone. I am the person who lives inside every Pakistan.

Dear President, Please stir your head

 

Imagine if you had no Air Conditions in your car, in your office, in your palace. Imagine, you had to walk few miles everyday to go to work in 45C. Imagine if you can, that you had no place to hide your entity. You had to pay the bills of electricity, gas and even water. Since your education would only get you a job of clerk, so imagine you are working as a clerk in some government department, you are about to end up making an excel sheet on which you are working from hours and suddenly the power goes off.

Imagine Mr. President that you fall sick, you go to the hospital and wait for hours to get Doctor’s appointment. Doctor charges you with huge bill and prescribes you medicines that you cannot afford. Imagine you are waiting in queue at a CNG station to get your cylinder filled because on next two days, there will be CNG load shedding.

Imagine Mr. President, you are desperately waiting for Budget 2011 to see if there’s an increment in pays and at the end you find it to be only 15%. Imagine you had to borrow money from your relatives/colleagues to pay fees of your children. Imagine you go to the market to buy fruit for your children and you find it out of your range. Imagine, you hardly live with your pay because even the things of daily use get out of your hand.

Mr. President, we live in a country where social injustice is matter of routine, where security remains only to high rise apartments of big authorities, where we bribe for our basic supplies, where the electricity is a dream, where liberty is in words only, where the jobs are sold, where the life is shred everyday.

It’s your moral obligation to sustain the basic rights of your nation. The world has seen the self-righteous leaders before you, and the world has witnessed their narrow ending. Don’t you fear of that time when these many feet high walls of your palace will be no more? Don’t you even think for a moment about the time when these bullet proof cars will be no more for you? The time twists Mr. President; Once Nazis were also in power, once King Louis ruled France, Once Alexander invaded half of the world but it doesn’t take huge point in time for the greatest of greatest empires to fall like ashes.

Your empire and all those fallen empires have one thing in common i.e. they also never worried about their people. Nazis shredded the core of right and wrong, what that was right for Nazis was imposed in Germany. On other hand People died of scarcity of food in France while the King Louis enjoyed the luxurious meals in his palace. Alexander had invaded half of world but he couldn’t invade the heart of people, his cruelty and greed for land led to his own destruction.

This is a stark truth but Sir, your government has all these flaws. Turn the table before table turns you. Its never too late, we are still looking for “Roti Kapra Makan” in the shade of torn clothes, holed roof and rotten bread.

Published : The News Blog

Random Thought: Ten Reasons to Love Zardari

Smiling Zardari at the nation

 

1. He smiles all the time. (At the foolishness of Nation)

2. He is very soft even if you talk rudely with him. Nawaz Sharif Talks very rudely with him but he in reply says “Big Brother”

3. He spent all his life in jail for the good of this nation. And today we all are spending life worse than jail.

4. It wasn’t his wish to become president as he is a down-to-earth person but he was threw at the deepest corner of pool where he had to swim to survive.

5. Just as we all loved Benazir, he also loves Benazir.

6. He is one handsome guy with trendsetting hair and mustache styles.

7. His daughter is somehow somehow HOT, because money speaks more than a person.

8. He is still unmarried ! look at his love for his wife.

9. He takes immediate notice of Target Killings in Karachi.

10. We all just love Zardari for nothing and this is the reason He is president today.

So stop speaking shit about him.

Musharraf the Face’Bukiyah’

Mushrraf The Face’Bukiya’

No formal introduction is required as the pro-Musharraf Brigade already tagged me as “Jamatiya” for writing a blog against Musharraf. This seems funny to me but It doesn’t switches my spirit off. This time we will have an overlook on “How to be famous leader”.

Facebook

Look! This is one easy way to assume that you are a famous leader. For this technique, the person should be retired from job. He must not work anywhere so that he can give maximum of his time to his fan page at facebook. At first, you will need to pay facebook a lot of money to advertise your page. Once your page is advertised, you will get many fans. After having so many fans, you have to show your artificial sympathies and condolences to on-going affairs of country, thus assuming yourself a famous person.

Just like Musharraf says ‘I am a popular leader’ but I have a question, do you really think those 3 lacs fans at your  facebook page will really vote for you?.

Now let look at the kind of comments Musharraf get at anything he posts at his fanpage.

Taken from Musharraf FB Fanpage

I hope Mr Musharraf, you don’t really think yourself to be Abraham Lincoln after somebody calling you ”Ebrahim Lankin”.

Bayan Bazi

Despite being against you Mr Musharraf, trust me I never thought you to be that low but I regret I was proved wrong after the statements you given about other political parties.

Shakal Achi na ho tou Baat tou Achi karlia karien.

Did I hear somebody saying that you were Mr. World once? Yeah. Musharraf Fans, please correct me if I am wrong.

‘Mein Jhoot Bolne Se Nahin Darta’

Of course, you don’t really need to say that, we already know this, sometimes our actions become slip of tongue. In fact I appreciate this, finally we have a ‘dictator-turned-politician’ who is not afraid to lie and he admits it on record.

Last but not the least, please don’t disgrace Iqbal by reading his verses wrong. You said ‘saza’ instead of ‘taqdeer’. I had to write this whole blog just to correct this.

Once I read a blog and it ended after few minutes, so this blog will also have to end now. See you soon people.

P.S: I am neither Jamatiya nor member of Noon League. Denying links with both parties doesn’t make me part of Tehreek e Insaf.

Look around, may be there’s a Baba Ji waiting for you.

One morning, we went to a Halwa Puri shop to have breakfast. Gossips, laughter’s, smiles were the ingredients of that old friends small get-together party. In the mean while when we were having fun, my eyes stopped at an old-man person sitting on a footpath nearby completely lost somewhere. For unknown reasons, I was trying to read him, he was looking nervous as if he lacks something. I have seen so many people in my life, but never tried to notice someone that closely but I don’t know, why this old-man was catching my attention. He was quiet with his hands over his head deeply lost in something.

There may be a person who is waiting for you to give food.

Talha ask that person if he need something, suddenly I spoke to my friend sitting beside me. My friend got up his seat and asked “Baba Ji Purian Khayen ge?,”, old-man nodded saying Paisay Nahi hain. We somehow managed to get him breakfast that morning but that incident never got off my head.

That day for the first time in life, I met a person who was probably extremely hungry but didn’t have enough money to get something, still with high self restraint and self respect, did not even ask anyone to get him something to eat but thinking deeply, probably waiting for some fairy to get him the food. He was one out of 170 million people who live around us.

Every face has a story to uncover, sometimes very pathetic stories that you want to cry. Many like that old Baba Ji move around, sit around us, but we are unable to uncover them. In my 21 years of life, I have attended hundreds of weddings, and in those hundreds of weddings, I saw thousands of people wasting food, the food which could be sun-shine for someone like Baba Ji. We live in such a society which is based on living standards for the people with money in their pockets, ignoring many others who live for food to eradicate their hunger and sometimes die because of same hunger.

Malnourished kids still wander in streets to look up for food

We get aids from different countries to get rid of hunger, but so often I wonder where does all the aids goes?, instead of decreasing, hunger and poverty is increasing with every sunrise. The World Bank has pledged 1.4 billion dollars in air and Asian Development Bank has already released 500 million dollars as the first tranche. And the U.S. has pledged to arrange, through the World Food Program (WFP) and other U.N. agencies, approximately 11,000 metric tonnes of wheat for over 1.6 million Pakistanis, but the interesting thing is that, we still have about 38 percent children population who are either underweight or malnourished and around 36.2 percent people who living below the poverty line. Primary enrollment of 5-9 years old children in Pakistan is the lowest in the region. Pakistan like many developing countries has been facing food shortages.

Food inflation soared beyond the control of government on one hand and food items went far beyond the access and affordability of common person. Price hike during Ramadan has ignited social unrest in country but government response is more focused on complying the donors demands rather than looking into the problem holistically.

Hunger is one important cause that is provoking crimes in our society. President Asif Ali Zardari unveiled 450 million dollars fund to support the poor in the form of Benazir Income Support program, but I am afraid to write 60 million Pakistani’s are facing food insecurity. According to the Washington-based International Food Policy Research Institute, levels of hunger in Pakistan are “alarming”. Instead of working on most important domestic problem, our government is expecting funds to wage a war against terrorism.

A society free of hunger will be a society free of crime. My body shakes at times when I think that a representative of a mazdoor in parliament is living a luxurious life while that mazdoor still lives below poverty line. Probably our leaders are unaware of the fact that Someday in God’s court they will have to face the reckoning of every person who slept hungry…

Published Here : Express Tribune